Monday, April 4, 2011

Roller-coasters, snipers, Asians and beat box prodigy

For a while I used to dream every night. They were never good dreams, or funny dreams, they were the type of dreams where i would wake up soaked in tears and sweat. (Not the good dreams) I would always die or someone was always trying to kill me.

They say if you die in a dream then you die in real life? Bull shit! I've watched myself die several times in my fucked up nightmares. Its not exactly something i looked forward to every night.

To my surprise and relief my nightmares started going away, in fact I wouldn't dream at all. Or if i did it was nothing worth remembering which is fine with me. Id rather have no dreams at all than terrifying horror stories every night.

But the other night a dream finally came to me...and it was probably one of the strangest dreams yet. Lets talk about it.

It all starts off at this party a friend of mine from work is throwing, we are all playing beer pong, havin a great time drinking and all that fun stuff. Dancing, music, ya know, the norm. Two of the girls left the party earlier than everyone else shortly after and me and my boyfriend made our way over to six flags.

Im telling you, this dream is pretty fucking random.

This six flags was not the normal six flags new england im used to. They had this ridiculously awesome roller coaster that hugs the side of a mountain and the best part about this ride is once you get to the top you have the most beautiful view of boston. So of course i was ready and willing to wait in line for this one. Luckily the line wasn't long and we were on the rollercoaster in no time.

They didnt have enough seats for me, and i didnt want to have to wait for the next cart to come so i decided it would be a great idea just to hang onto the bars of the seat my boyfriend was sitting in. (im terrified of heights, even in my dream) I dont know why i thought it would be okay, but the people working the line didnt seem to care so whats the big deal right?

Once im latched onto the bars of his car i realize that i was an idiot and we are WAY to high up! Suddenly we get to the view of Boston and my boyfriend is screaming at me to turn my head away from the mountain so i can see how awesome it is, but instead i start crying with my head buried into my arm as we go through the last twist and turns of ride.

I dont remember exactly how we ended up at a mall after six flags, but thats where we were random. But in the hallways of the mall there was a party going on. Shot girls handing out free shooters, cocktail waitressing giving you your favorite free beers...It was heaven in a mall. There was music, dancing, everyone was having a great time.

I decide to grab my drink and take a look around, thats when i get to the area that changed it all.

In the mall there was a huge room surrounded by glass windows, the kind of windows that make the building look like there are no walls to keep you from falling off the edge. It also doubled as a classroom full of elementary school students who were all on the ground with there hands covering there heads and before i can realize what the fuck is going on i hear someone yell "GET DOWN!"

I immediately drop to the floor and when i glance up i realize, in the windows, we are surrounded by Asian snipers and they are all pointing at me.

I start screaming "Please don't kill me! I don't want to die!" not knowing why they want to kill me in the first place. I hear voices from all different directions telling me to do this and do that when all i want is to get the fuck out of there. Who wants to be surrounded by a bunch of crazy ninja assassin people? Even though im not even sure ninjas would need snipers. But im just throwing the typical asian stereotype out there. You didnt know all asians are ninjas?

Finally I think to myself that at least if i die trying to escape, id know id tried. I slowly back up and book it to hide behind a corner and get back into the party hallway.

I made it! I guess dream me is just way to quick for asian snipers to handle, but once i get back into the party hallway everyone is mean muggin me. Its like the party stopped just to stare...I mean take a picture! its lasts longer, gawsh.

I look at everyone all at once and scream "What the fuck is going on and why is everyone staring at me!?"

"Your the one" whispers a voice in background

"Im the what?"....still confused here people!!!

"Its you, your the one they want! You dont know who you are and what your are capable of. Do you even know anything about your past?"  A man says. we are getting somewhere

"Apparently not, can you tell me?" I try to ask politely but the snipers outside the building trying to kill me are making it a little hard to stay calm.

And here is where it gets good

"You are the only living relative of a beat box prodigy. And they cant let you fulfill your destiny."


"What!?! I don't even know how to beat box." I answer in complete confusion.

"Well, you like to sing right?" says the man

"yeah. So."

"Well it all starts there, and then suddenly you have talents you never knew you had"


It was definitely one of the most bizarre dreams ive had in a while. And ive had some pretty strange dreams.

Have you heard me beat box before?

Here is a little sample of my beat-boxing skills. Im pretty fab,

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